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II Samuel
Chapter 13
{David's
2nd and 3rd Installments of 4 Installments of Discipline
David Violated Wife of Uriah - His Daughter Tamar will Be Violated by
her Half -Brother -- David Had Uriah Killed - His Rapist Son Amnon
will Be Killed by Absalom}
1~~And
it came to pass after this
{after the Fall of Rabah, cursing of the 1st installment of discipline
turned into blessing, and a period of prosperity and intake of
doctrine that followed},
that
Absalom, the son of David,
had
an 'extremely beautiful' {yapheh} sister, whose name was Tamar.
And
Amnon, the son of David
{the oldest boy and Tamar's half-brother},
fell
in love with her.
{Note: See notes at II Samuel Chapter 3:3 concerning Tamar and Absalom's heritage. Amnon was the oldest son of David and the heir apparent. He apparently had any woman in the area he wanted. Tamar's mother was from a line of aristocratic warriors who ruled a large part of the world from circa 2000BC to circa 980BC referred to as the Indo-Aryan or Hurrians. So, when Tamar who was a young lady of good breeding and training refused his advances, his sexual arrogance becomes obvious. Click here to see more on sex}
{Frustration
of Sexual Arrogance}
2~~And
Amnon became so frustrated
that
he made himself ill {lusting}
because
of his sister Tamar . . .for she was a virgin.
{b@thuwlah - a special word for a virgin - meaning that she was
not only a literal virgin but one with integrity. She was satisfied
with her state and willing to wait for her right man to both marry
and have relations with a man}
And Amnon considered it impossible to do anything at all to her.
3~~Now
Amnon had an intimate friend {a cousin},
whose
name was Jonadab,
the
son of David's brother Shimeah.
And Jonadab was a man of extreme cunning.
{The
Weak Prince}
4~~And
he {Jonadab}
'said
to'/'inquisited to gain advantage over' him,
"O
'son of the King'
{a formal title of the crown prince (next in line to the throne)},
why
are you so depressed . . . morning after morning?
{when the arrogant are frustrated, they become depressed}
Will you not tell me?"
And
Amnon replied unto him,
"I
am in love with Tamar . . . my brother Absalom's sister."
{'love'
in itself is nothing - it is only as good as the character of the
person who utters the phrase. So, here it just means this
arrogant prince has found an object of his self-gratification -
to satisfy his narcissus syndrome or maybe she is just a challenge}
{Bad
Advice - Leading to Amnon's Rape of His Own Half-Sister}
5~~Consequently,
Jonadab said unto him {Amnon},
"Lay
down on your bed and pretend to be sick {to fain illness}.
Now
when your father comes to see you,
say
unto him {David}, please/'I pray you',
let
my sister Tamar come, and give me something to eat.
Let
her prepare the food in my sight,
that
I may watch and eat it from her hand."
{Amnon
the 'Flimflam' Man}
6~~So
Amnon went to bed and pretended to be sick.
And
when the king {David} was came to visit him
{Jonadab probably made sure the king knew his oldest son was 'ill'},
Amnon
said unto the king, "Please/'I pray you',
let
Tamar, my sister, come,
and
prepare me a couple of crapes {rolled pancakes}
in
my presence, that I might eat from her hand."
{Note: Amnon is implying that someone is trying to poison him. But David, is naïve toward his oldest son and will not catch on to the stupidity of this situation. Tamar is protected in David's castle and has no business leaving without her servants and coming to an unprotected place, even if it is with her older half-brother.}
7~~Then
David 'sent a message' to Tamar, saying, "Go please
{an order from the King to a royal princess - polite, but an order}
now
to your brother Amnon's palace,
and
prepare {another order} him food."
8~~Consequently,
Tamar went to her brother Amnon's palace
and
he was 'laying down {pretending to be ill}'.
And
she took dough, and kneaded it and folded,
and
made crapes in his presence,
and
did bake the crapes.
{Note: This action was the culmination of the lust of Amnon, the plotting of Jonadab, and the authority of David. Daivd is an innocent dupe. But part of this phase of his discipline, is the part he will take in the rape of Tamar.}
9~~Then
she took a pan,
and
served {the crapes} out before him . . . but he refused to eat.
And Amnon said, "Have all the men depart from me".
And they went out every man from him.
10~~And
Amnon said unto Tamar,
"Bring
the food into the bed-chamber,
that
I may eat from your hand."
Then
Tamar took the crapes which she had made,
and
brought them into the bedroom to Amnon her brother.
{Verses
11-14: Sexual Arrogance of Amnon - Criminal Arrogance}
11~~And
when she had brought them to him to eat,
he
'seized her with violence overpowering' {chazaq - Hiphil stem} her,
and
said unto her,
"Copulate
with me, my sister."
{actually this is tamer then the actual Hebrew - he used vulgar
language here}
12~~And
she answered him,
"No
{an expression of her negative free will}, my brother,
do
not violate/rape me . . .
for
such thing should not be done in Israel
{Israel here is used in the sense of a nation under the laws of
establishment of God}.
Do not do this criminal act.
{Note: Arrogant people have no respect for either the feelings of others or the free will expressions of others. Tamar reminds her brother that first of all incest is an offense with capital punishment as the stated judgment. And, for a future king to commit the crime of rape, what message does that send to his nation about crime? She does NOT say this is a sin -so it is likely she does believe Amnon is a saved man.}
{Tamar's
Rouge to Forestall Rape}
13~~"What
about me?
{idiom: literally: 'and I?'}
where
shall I get rid of my disgrace/shame?
And
'what about you'/as for you,
you
shall be as one of the criminals of Israel.
Now
therefore, please/'I pray you',
speak
to the king . . .
for
he will not 'hinder you from marrying me'/
'withhold
me from you'.
{Note: A demoralized woman in rape is lost. Tamar is keeping her head and thinking. She tries 3 tactics that should work with most people. First, she points out to her brother that once raped, she can never marry. The day the bible was written was very legalistic and judgmental. A princess only has a few suitors anyway. And, none would believe that a princess, as protected as they are, did not really consent. Next, she points out that as a criminal, her brother was not likely to be elevated to king. Third, she says just ask your father, David, he will deny you nothing. So we can marry and no disgrace would be on either of us (wrong - but a good attempt to delay).}
{The
Rape}
14~~But
he refused to listen to her
and
because he was stronger than she was,
he
overpowered her and raped her.
{Note: This is an act of sexual arrogance and power arrogance - the same two states of soul that David had when he violated Bathsheba - the wife of Uriah the Hittite. So this is the 2nd installment of punishment to David for his failure with Bathsheba (the death of their baby of the sexual act was the 1st installment).}
{The
Arrogant Psychological Fragmentation of Amnon}
15~~Then
Amnon hated her with an intense hatred
{ sane' . . . sane' - doubling of the verb - very Strong}
for
the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love
with
which he had loved her.
Then
Amnon said to her, "Get up . . . get out {two commands}."
{Note: Fragmentation is the state such as where a homosexual rapist in prison rapes and kills a child molester because in his version of arrogant self-righteousness, he sees the child rapist as despicable. So, it refers to inconsistent thinking. This passage has to be interpreted in terms of the day it was written. So, RBT says that once Tamar was a 'raped princess', in the warped thinking of this day, she was a 'ruined person' and not worthy of Amnon's 'love' anymore. So, now hate, rape, from 'love' all in a little time. Amnon's thinking is fragmented and unorganized. He caused her 'social disgrace' (well to those who JUDGE her as ruined - stupid and evil-thinking people).}
{Reality
of Reason}
16~~But
she replied to him,
"Do
not become the cause
of
this greater evil.
To
throw me out . . .
after
what you have done to me."
But he refused to listen to her.
{Note: This is hard for most of us to understand that there could be something worse then the rape by her brother! Throwing her out at this moment is the GREATER evil! By throwing her out, it would be implied that it was Tamar not Amnon who was responsible for this act of evil.}
{The
Indifference of Arrogance}
17~~Then
he shouted for his valet/'his servant waiting on him',
and
commanded, "'Throw out with violence' this {tramp} . . .
NOW
. . . away from me - OUT
{she was only allowed to wear one item of clothing - a royal slip}
and
bolt the door after her.
{Note: Amnon was implying his sister was a nymphomaniac. He was not correct in the way he treated her. Arrogant people blame others for their weaknesses. And, in his arrogance now he maligns his righteous sister.}
18~~Now
'she was wearing'/'on her'/ a 'chemise with long sleeves'
{k@thoneth - an undergarment/petticoat (though RBT prefers
'chemise'} . . .
for
it was customary for the king's daughters who were virgins dressed
{under their robes}.
Then
his servant seized her and caused her to go outside
and
bolted the door after her.
{Note: In his cruelty Amnon knew exactly what he was doing. The royal princess wore a long sleeved chemise that no one else was allowed to wear. Once she married, then she must wear the short sleeve type. Well Amnon threw her out on the street wearing only her 'royal sign of her virginity'. Tamar would become a social outcast to all the people of this day - a terribly wrong and anti-grace attitude - but still the prevailing attitude of the day.}
19~~And
Tamar put dust on her head,
and
'tore in pieces' her 'chemise with long sleeves' that was on her
{so in her great sense of honor, she was not qualified in her own
mind to wear the sign of a virgin - so she tore it off and started
home to Castle Zion naked},
and
'covered her face with her hands'/'laid her hands on her head',
and
went on and on and on . . . crying aloud and sobbing.
{Note: The verb for going on is doubled again very strong in the Hebrew. It is a picture of this beautiful woman wandering naked through all the streets for everyone to see her disgrace. She is now mortified and covering her face - as some women finding themselves naked would do - and grieving over her lost status in life - remember this is the GREATER evil that her brother did to her in her own viewpoint.}
{Note: From the next verse, we see that apparently someone notified Absalom that his sister was wondering the street naked. So, he searched the streets out for her and brought her back to his palace.}
{Counsel
of Absalom}
20~~Then
Absalom, her brother, said unto her,
"Has
Amnon, your brother, been with you?"
{in his tenderness and maturity here, Absalom is using a euphemism
'been with you' meaning raped/had sex with her. The point in
Amnon in his arrogance used vulgar language, where Absalom in
his sympathy used the euphemism - there is a time to use them.
Another point here: 'A man's alertness is a woman's protection.
Absalom from his very question indicates he suspected bad
intentions on the part of Amnon for a while.}
{Tamar
must indicate a positive response so Absalom continues:}
"Do
not plan revenge, my sister . . .
{Idiom: literally 'but hold now your peace'}
for
he {Amnon} is your brother.
Do
not worry/brood over this thing."
{Idiom: literally 'but do not put your heart to this thing'}
Consequently
Tamar remained desolate/'a destroyed woman'
in
her brother Absalom's house.
{Note: Absalom gave very good advice. To bad he does not take the same advice himself! The principal is 'vengeance is Mine, saith the Lord'. But under his distorted honor code, when David does nothing to punish his favorite 'first born son', Absalom will murder him to avenge his full sister's disgrace.}
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